They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
Randomize
