He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
Randomize
