ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Randomize
