so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
You brought string cheese to the strip club
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
Randomize
