You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
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