I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
now i know why i became what i already was.
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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