i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
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