Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
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