It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Randomize
