yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
Randomize
