she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
Randomize
