just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
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