i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
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