i need an iv and a liver transplant
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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