glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
I hope mine doesn't look like that
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
