So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
It was my first time buying condoms at the liquor store... I was nervous and there were quite a few people, so I tried to do it as quickly and quietly as possible. When I got to the Indian cashier, he took one look at them and said loudly, "Ohhh you gonna get it on tonight, ah?!"
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
Randomize
