Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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