That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
Randomize
