did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
This is not my ceiling
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
Randomize
