whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
i just used the Cadillac of toilet papers. For a minute i actually forgot i was even wiping my ass....i thought i was floating butt first into heaven
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
I am never drinking with the goths again.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Randomize
