I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
Randomize
