Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
Randomize
