Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
I just took what could be the most awkward shit in my life, which considering my definition of awkward and my experiences shitting, is pretty fucking awkward.
...
I was sitting there doing my business and the guy in the stall next to me banged on the stall and asked me how to spell picnic because he wasn't sure.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
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