after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
Randomize
