Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Randomize
