She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
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