Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
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