Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
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