I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
I was not drunk enough for that final.
Randomize
