giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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