bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
Randomize
