The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
