Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
Randomize
