remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize