I knew I had to get an abortion when his toddler sister came up to hug my leg and I kicked her off saying, "Get off, fucker."
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
50% drunk capacity currently
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
Randomize
