so this carnie looked at me and said "the ride in my pants is funner." i wet myself.
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
The feeling are messing with the penis
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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