You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
Randomize
