I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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