She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
How naked do you want me to be?
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