Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
I need a beard to bite.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
