He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize
