Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
Randomize
