omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
Randomize
