The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
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