I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
