well most of my day revolves around power hour
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
Randomize
