Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
Randomize
