found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
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