remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Randomize
