Is it normal to miss your booty call?
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
I licked your asshole in confidence.
Based on my calculations, I should be blackout by approximately 11:14pm and that's when I need you to take my phone away from me. Mkay?
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Randomize
