this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
Randomize