Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
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